Assisted Living: A Catholic Alternative
GUEST COLUMN
How long ago was it that unmarried women took care of the old folks on the family farm? A hundred years or more? Now it is common for 70-year-olds to try to care for their 90-year-old parents alone in an apartment — or for semi-disabled 75-year-old parents to live with their adult children. One of my sons-in-law described the problem after I had lived with his family for a year with this joke:
40-year-old daughter: Mom, don’t worry. If you are ever really disabled, we’ll take care of you.
Me: How can you tell me that when your husband hates me?
Her husband: Ronda, when you are much older, vulnerable, and in a wheelchair, you’ll be much easier to live with!
He is probably right. Even if I gagged myself, or tried my hardest not to say anything controversial, they knew what I thought about certain matters and would feel insulted anyway. Most annoying is they told me that I think they must provide whatever I need immediately, even when they are multitasking with their children.
Luckily for all of us, there is an alternative: Catholic assisted living.
But, but, but…many older people don’t want to go to assisted-living facilities, which they imagine to be depressing places. Old goats sitting around mirroring each other’s decrepitude? No thanks. Not seeing beloved, if often annoying, family members on a daily basis? Sounds awful. Listening to music at mealtimes we would never choose ourselves? Ugh. Basically just waiting to die? Atrocious.
If you, dear reader, are horrified by the idea of going into assisted living (or sending one of your elderly relatives there), read on!
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