The Sin in Masturbation

It may seem petty, in this age of militant homosexuality and AIDS, of teenage promiscuity and abortion, of outspoken perversity so great that even pederasts lobby for recognition, to speak of the sin in masturbation. Indeed, it seems that most people have forgotten — if indeed they ever knew — that there is anything sinful in it at all. Perhaps not many would publicly extol masturbation, as our former Surgeon General did, to her political cost. But I would venture to guess that most would consider it a harmless peccadillo not to be spoken of in polite company, but not to be particularly condemned either. Such, in fact, was my own opinion until quite recently.

I was raised in a very liberal Protestant family in which masturbation, and sex generally, were simply not discussed. When, in my early adolescence, my parents detected in me a growing interest in sex, they handed my a book, and invited me to ask any questions I might have after reading it. This book, though tame by modern sex education standards, was fairly characteristic of the breed: Sexual intercourse was discussed wholly in terms of biology and reproductive “plumbing.” Pretty dry stuff — though explicit enough to be erotic to a 14-year-old.

But not a word did it say about masturbation — nor did my parents, my Sunday school teachers (United Church of Christ), or any other responsible adult. No one threatened me with acne, hair on my palms, imbecility, or an inevitable descent into horrible immorality. Nor did anyone inform me about the very real dangers — as opposed to the fabricated bogeymen that adults have used to scare children — that attend masturbation.

Small wonder, then, that I soon fell into the habit. True, the voice of conscience was not silent. Though no one ever told me that masturbation was wrong (and when I got to college, textbooks told me it was right), I nevertheless felt that it was somehow shameful, somehow beneath my dignity. Yet with nothing substantial to oppose it, I found the temptation overwhelming, and succumbed. And over the years what weak resistance I had initially offered all but vanished.

I will not inflict on the reader the details of this practice, still less of the sordid fantasies which, as is usually the case, were the accompaniment and spur to masturbation. Suffice it to say that I was thoroughly enslaved by the habit. Somehow I knew even then that it was slavery, though the world told me that it was merely a harmless exercise of sexual freedom. Still, part of me longed to be free of it. I told myself that my first sexual experience with a woman would cure me. It didn’t. I imagined that marriage would solve the problem. It didn’t. I felt sure that when I had children of my own, I could easily jettison such a puerile practice. I couldn’t.

What enabled me to break the bonds of this enslavement was acknowledging that masturbation is sin, confessing it to my wife and my spiritual counselors, and turning to Christ for the power to break with it. So long as I tried to persuade myself that masturbation was not sin, or at least too trivial a sin to count, I was trapped.

What finally brought me around to this realization was nothing less than the near collapse of my marriage. My wife and I had drifted inexorably apart from each other over a period of years, and although my masturbation was no means the only cause, or even a major cause, of this drift, I had to face the fact that it was a key factor — and that the salvation of my marriage required a total break with this form of sexual immorality.

Which brings us from the realm of the personal (and believe me, I am not usually one to bare his soul in public) to the general. What is it about masturbation that makes it sinful? Where is the harm in it?

The basic sin in masturbation is simply this: It circumvents the purposes for which God gave sexuality to men and women. Sexual intercourse, as the modern world has forgotten, plays two roles in human life. First, it unites husband and wife into “one flesh,” bringing the two complementary aspects of the image of God in humankind together. This uniting is intended to take place, not only on the physical level, but on the psychic and spiritual levels as well, and for this reason sexuality is intended to be expressed only within the indissoluble bond of marriage.

Secondly, sexual intercourse is intended to reproduce human life. Far more than mere biological reproduction, humans are granted the inexpressible privilege of co-operating with God in bringing a new soul into existence. And not only bringing it into the world, but nurturing it, and beginning to prepare it for an eternal destiny. Again, a task of such awesome proportions must be carried out within a permanent and godly marriage.

Masturbation frustrates both these purposes. Obviously, the procreative function of sex is evaded. Though masturbation is not literally “the sin of Onan” (Gen. 38:9), the end result is the same — the “seed is spilled on the ground.” In masturbation there is no openness to life, no looking toward the future. There is only the present moment, the present clamoring urge. And for this reason, when the moment is past there can be no looking back to it in wonder and love. It is a dead moment, slain by selfishness.

In the same way, habitual masturbation gnaws away at the unitive function of sexuality in marriage, and can destroy it altogether. To have a joyous sexual experience with one’s wife takes time. It requires an inner unity, a peace between the two members of the one flesh. There must be tenderness, patience, and humor. Masturbation, on the other hand, is easy by comparison: There is the urge, there is the act. The sin of sloth paves the way for masturbation, which is the easy way to sexual gratification. What’s worse, the attitude that leads to masturbation easily infects the sexual relationship between husband and wife, so that sexual intercourse becomes merely a way to relieve the sexual urge, is no more than masturbation with an available body.

As we have seen, masturbation is centered on the self. For this reason, it is spiritually unhealthy at every stage of development. The adolescent who masturbates prior to marriage demonstrates a selfish impatience, as well as an obsession with sexual gratification. The unmarried adult who masturbates shows a lack of trust in God, determined to experience sexual pleasure even if God has not given his approval to it. But masturbation is most harmful within marriage, where it attenuates the physical attraction between husband and wife that is such a powerful motive for resolving conflicts, and shortcircuits the impulse to unity.

Moreover, masturbation does not usually happen in a vacuum. The urge to masturbate becomes strongest when the heart is empty or troubled: when one is bored, dissatisfied, lonely, angry, or restless. Masturbation provides an easy escape from these discontents; yet the release it gives is purely temporary, and afterwards the emptiness is more profound than ever. As J. Christoph Arnold points out, “it closes us within a dream world and separates us from genuine relationships. It aggravates isolation and loneliness and cuts us off from our own heart’s yearning for love” (A Plea for Purity: God, Sex, and Marriage [Plough Publishing], 1996).

The sinfulness of masturbation is compounded by the pornographic materials or erotic fantasies that almost invariably attend it. For in pornography and sexual fantasy the image of God which is present in every human being is treated as a mere means of pleasure. These vices are not, therefore, “victimless crimes.” The perpetrator degrades his own sexuality, the humanity of the objects of his lust, and the very image of God himself. In a very real way, he makes himself guilty of sacrilege and blasphemy.

The social effects of pornography and sexual fantasy — their contribution to the epidemic of sexual crime — have been intensely debated in recent years. But the inner effects of pornography and fantasy are inescapable. Jesus tells us that the man who looks at a woman in order to excite sexual feelings has already committed adultery in his heart (Mt. 5:28). He has separated himself from God through this sin. Moreover, since the eye is the light of the body (Lk. 11:34), gazing on erotic images or conjuring them up in “the mind’s eye” pollutes the whole person inwardly.

Thus, the sin of masturbation is by no means petty. Though other sexual sins may be more dramatic in their outward effects, the inner attitude that nourishes masturbation, and the inner corrosion that it causes are no less serious. Far from being a sideshow in the present sexual circus, masturbation is a key issue. It is more than ever crucial in our time to confront it openly: to name it as a sin, to reject all modernistic psychologizing away of its sinfulness, to encourage one another to confess it and repent of it. In this, as in so many other things, Christians must dare to be “old-fashioned.” For if we are unfaithful in this “little” thing, we shall find ourselves unable to be faithful in greater matters.