Volume > Issue > The Bileworm Memorandum

The Bileworm Memorandum

SIX STRATEGIES FOR SATANIC SOVEREIGNTY

By Eugene Hoyas | February 2001
Eugene Hoyas, a Byzantine Catholic, is a brand manager for a coatings manufacturer in New Jersey.

I found this memo in my e-mail. I could not trace its source or destination. After reading it carefully, I have decided to share its contents with you. For all I know, it could be nothing more than a prank. On the other hand, it may well be genuine. In any event, I have taken its contents to heart and consider myself forewarned.

Memorandum To: Darkbloat From: Bileworm

Subject: Destruction of Christianity — Millennial

Business Plan

Per your request I have compiled this brief outline of our proposed business plan. I have taken the liberty to include previous business strategies, as they prove invaluable in charting our course for the decades ahead.

Objective

1. To completely obliterate Christianity and all worship of the Enemy.

2. Enslave human souls in our sector forever.

In order to achieve these objectives, our demons in marketing have, over the past two millennia, devised six principal strategies, each with its own tactical considerations.

Enjoyed reading this?

READ MORE! REGISTER TODAY

SUBSCRIBE

You May Also Enjoy

Infinite Monkey Theorem

I hated myself for helping the ape. I hated the pleasure his development gave me, like I was a god lifting this furry mute from stupidity.

The Presence of the Chaotic One in Times of Disorder

God equipped man with the ability to see and understand the Devil based on his effects in the material world and through his material manifestations.

Exorcisms in the Modern World

Bizarre elements in cases of demonic possession are evidence of supernatural activity, but mostly these elements are subtle and disturbing rather than melodramatic.